Happy 2019 everyone! I know it’s cliche, but I truly do appreciate the start of a new year. Not for the basic reasons of getting fit, eating healthier, reading more, etc (though those are all very good goals). I more look forward to it because of the feeling of starting something brand new. I am always going to be me on some level, but every year I attain to be a better version of me, and what better time to try then at the start of the new year so that you can see your growth by the end of it!
Every year I strive to be a better wife, mother, sister, friend. I try to do that by planning activities, outings, making sure I stay in contact with people. In all that, I tend to neglect myself, as many mothers do, because my families happiness is above all. This year, I want to take care of that. I want to be better to myself by taking the time I need to recharge from hectic days, stepping outside my comfort zone and challenging myself (like by starting this blog) to do things I’m not confident with but know I am capable of. I want to take it easy on myself when I feel that I haven’t gotten to where I want to be. I want to be more patient with my children, and understand that they are growing and can’t be perfect. I want to take the time to do the things that make me happy.
I know these are pretty general goals, and it helps to have a solid plan in order to reach them. I’m not sure how I can plan to be a more patient mom (got any tips?), but I can put some reminders to myself along side my list of how to attain my more specific goals. Here it goes!
How I plan to attain my goals for 2019 (and beyond):
Goal 1: Better self care
Now, I know self care can mean a lot of things. For me, it’s less about getting my nails done and more about taking care of my body and mind. I’m an introvert at heart, which can be hard for a parent. I often need to recharge after playdates, birthday parties, general life. I think the biggest thing I can do for myself is to let my family know when I need some alone time. Even if it’s just for 15 minutes. Other things I can do are:
- Go on more shopping trips sans kids (hello Target!).
- Get back into ballet or some sort of physical activity. I took adult ballet for a solid year before kids and felt so good! I’m not the type of person to go to a gym, so if it’s not ballet something like pilates will have to do.
- Maybe actually get my nails done like I used to in my college days. If not in the salon, then I will take the time to do them myself. It’s small, but something about a manicured hand makes me feel good.
- Planning more. I love writing down my plans and often don’t have the time. I love writing things down with pretty colorful pens, and planning for the things that are coming or that I know have to get done.
- Drink more water! I need to do this, like, yesterday.
Goal 2: Stepping outside of my comfort zone
This blog is a good start to that goal (yay me!) but I want to do more. Besides making this blog into “something”, I have always wanted to make my own stickers and planners. I find more times than not that I can’t always get what I’m looking for at Michael’s or Jo Ann Fabric’s, and while Etsy is a great alternative, I’m an instant gratification kind of girl. I don’t know if I would sell them, as I’m still learning a lot and I don’t want to overwhelm myself, but it is something I am thinking about in the future!
Beside potential business ventures, I really want to be more bold in my wardrobe choices. Color, especially bright pinks and reds, make me happy but living in a colder climate, I tend to gravitate toward darker colors in the winter and fall. I’m a mix of preppy/casual and while I have tons of Disney clothes, they are all in the basic red, black and white palette. They don’t include my favorite colors of pinks, yellows, mints, and orange (like my summer wardrobe does). I have already slowly started to incorporate these colors into my fall and winter wardrobe and I’m so excited to show you the pieces I have picked up thus far! To continue stepping out of my comfort zone, I plan to:
- Continue to blog every Sunday or possibly twice a week. I’m taking this slow.
- Make time to work on sticker and planner design (but for real).
- This ties into the second bullet point, but play around with my Cricut machine more to design and cut my own stickers.
- Be more mindful of color choices in sweaters, shirts, and pants for the fall and winter. As sales are happening, replace a gray or black piece with a more colorful one. Also, incorporate a colorful coat as opposed to the standard black puffy coats (this one is already done!).
Goal 3: Practicing patience, understanding, and being less critical
This one seems like a doozy. I am trying to be more mindful about not losing my temper so easily with my children. At the age of almost 4 and 6, they tend to fight. A lot. I expect this of siblings, being one myself, but sometimes it’s too much. Add on looking at seemingly perfect kids on social media that are hugging and playing so nicely with their siblings, and I feel like I failed. I question my parenting and whether or not I’m doing a good job raising them. I’m yelling at them to not yell at each other which is of course ridiculous, telling them not to be so loud, telling them to stop this and that. I know not everything posted on social media is a true picture of what is happening in so and so’s life, but in the throws of parenting your mind plays tricks on you. I’m trying to find alternative words to “stop doing that”, “don’t cry”, stop yelling”. In addition, I’m trying to:
- Realize my kids have different needs. Kids are not one size fits all and I have a very headstrong girl, and a sort of sensitive boy. How I talk to one needs to be adjusted for the other and so forth.
- Lessen screen time. I do think that some of their tantrums and fighting come from too much youtube watching. While I love their tablets for a distraction to get things done, I need to find better alternatives. We have already started slowly doing this by only allowing their regular tablet with no internet until the weekend, and we plan on taking it a step further by only allowing the tablets on the weekends. I think this will really help improve everyones mood.
- Think about my words before I say them out loud. Kids are sponges, and I have so much proof of that. One day, after taking pics for a blog post, I saw my little girl arranging her toys to take a picture just like mommy (it was quite cute). That said, if I want them to treat each other and their classmates well, I have to make sure I’m leading by example. Instead of saying “don’t do that” and leave it at that, I need to make sure I explain why they shouldn’t do something. I’m guilty of using the “because I said so” and with an inquisitive child, that just isn’t going to cut it anymore.
- I need to remember to not compare myself to other moms and their kids. Social media only shows snippets of someone’s life, and I can’t keep beating myself up when my kids don’t want to take that perfect family photo or when it seems like they just fight all day. I, like every other parent, am doing the best I can. My family is different and I have to embrace that and give myself a break all while remembering that it’s likely those kids don’t always want to take pictures and fight too. I think we could all be a lot happier and less critical of ourselves in this world by realizing that someone out there has the same exact thoughts as you. No one is perfect.
In general, I just want to make sure I’m doing things that make me happy and consequently, keep my family happy. I love that this blog is an outlet for me to get my thoughts out and is a step in the right direction. I’m hoping things can only go up from here!
I’m not sure if I’ll hit all of these goals, but that’s the good thing about a new year, new month, new day. You get to try again! I hope you all have the best new year filled with health, happiness, and love!
Bye for now!